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Michael is the father of Shannon. The pair are members of a purity group that pitches abstinence though "dating" their own children in "My Purity Ball and Chain".

When Steve is forcibly volunteered to participate in an abstinence program at school, Shannon tells him afterwards that she enjoyed his performance and gives him a group flier. When Stan discovers the flier, he believes it to be his ticket out of giving a sex talk to Steve in addition to getting to wear a sword with the other fathers. When Steve and Shannon start getting too close to each other, Stan tries to keep them apart. But when they are discovered holding hands under a fallen banner by Michael, the other fathers threaten to kick the pair out unless Steve attends Sex Aversion Therapy Camp.

Steve is so traumatized by the camp that he can no longer even look at girls without becoming nauseous at a purity ball. When Stan realizes what he has done, as well as seeing that the other fathers are really creeps in "dating" their own daughters, he shuts Steve and Shannon alone in a broom closet and fends off the other sword-wielding dads, while giving Steve his own version of a sex talk. He succeeds long enough for the pair to score at the price of becoming severely injured.

Michael is voiced by Peter Mackenzie.

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